Traumatic Loss

Are you familiar with the effects of severe trauma? One of them is memory loss. I suffered that back in 2007 after all these thousands of pages of work appeared to fall into the hands of industry supported frauds. I was so troubled by thinking about my good work and how it might be used against me that I couldn't stand to think about it anymore and ended up forgetting the whole year all at once. It was like I woke up the next morning and I couldn't remember a thing. My memory loss bumped me all the way back to 1999 when I first shared my work on Blogger and has forced me to retrace every step of my life since then. So now its 2017 and my account is about the same as it looked at the end of 2007 - just before it was torn to pieces by those fraud stars on TV. When we suffer from trauma, we're not altogether responsible for our behavior; we're not ourselves. We lose sight of basic priorities like being careful with our money. I think the trauma of this crime added to the trauma of my friends and parents all dying on me in the last ten years has made it hard for me to stay on track with my savings. I'm so miserably depressed from this crime and all the constant lies that are told about me to support it that I am constantly looking for comfort either from a can of beer or a joint. While I don't spend a fortune on them, they do deplete my savings. Another problem has been the cost of my cigarette smoking. A smoker finds quitting smoking very stressful and the last thing I need right now is more stress. Nonetheless, I'm into my second day with nothing but gum in my mouth and I'm holding out. I just wanted to explain why I've been having problems saving my money. Does it sound reasonable? So my bank is the Bank of Montreal. I must commend them on their generous donation to the VPL, as it is presented for me here on the home page of the library's website. $150,000.00. Nice. And it was right after I checked my savings account to make sure I still had my forty dollars that I was saving for groceries and saw that it had been removed to penalize me with service charges. Forty dollars a month. That's what my trauma has been costing me at my bank every month. And I've had my account there for twenty-two years. So forty dollars a month times twenty-two years comes to well over ten thousand dollars of service charges on my account. So where did the bank get $150,000.00 to donate to the library? Maybe they got it from fifteen customers like myself who've had accounts with them for over twenty years. I'm staying with the BMO because it is the people bank. As banks go, it's one of the better ones, with respect to customer service. However, I think it is only fair to tell them that I am going to be quite rich one day - extremely rich. As it was put to me, I am going to be rich enough to have my own jet. This was told to me by a voice that has been one hundred percent accurate with everything else it said about my future up to now, so I believe it, even though it seems to defy all the signs around me at the moment. And when I'm rich, I'm sure my bank will want me to keep my money in their vault, but I will have the memory of how I've been treated over the last twenty-two years to remind me of their true disposition towards me.
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